Tessa Turns Forty-two

When God makes a little baby in its mommy’s tummy, He has a guardian angel typing the baby’s DNA real fast like a crazy little motherfucker. Sometimes the guardian angel makes a typographical error in the DNA and the baby is born with an extra-long neck or something. If the baby is a cow, it […]

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What the F*#%, Indeed!

Howard Stern made his millions by tapping into the id of his listeners. He speaks his listeners’ thoughts: “I hate Kathie Lee Gifford’s guts, but I’d sure like to make love to her.” That kind of thing. “Personally, morally, I’m opposed to abortions, but there ought to be more of them.” See what I mean? […]

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